Gender equality? More like the revenge of feminists.

In a world where women can act on stages, drive (at least in most countries), vote, and somehow be respected for being an acknowledged human being, we women have managed to commit the biggest mistake one could make: do what was done to us to others.

Despite our good intention to “reinforce girl power”, we have alienated ourselves even more from men, forcing them to accept our legitimate place in society. Sure, most men still have this preconceived idea of male superiority (which, let’s be honest, is not unwelcome for their ego). But there is no such thing that justifies women forcing men into accepting another school of thought. Force is never the solution. It only nurtures a deep sentiment of anger, similar to what women were feeling when being dominated by men and which eventually led them into starting a massive revolution sprouting groups like the Suffragette movement.

Women are right to defend themselves. They are right to assume their eligibility into a modern society. But what I personally don’t get are the women who belittle men. This is what i am criticising in this article. Women who act like those they are fighting against. Sure, we haven’t reached the level of moral, physical and legal persecution men had on us, but some of us are moving towards this direction. And we need to stop it right now.

This fight to belittle men and try to dominate them is as bad as men doing the same on women. Extremists cloak this idea underneath the term ‘gender equality’. This is far from promoting equality. This is stupid and shallow. I am not a feminist. Or a male chauvinist. I defend human equality. We should look at both sides. Most women’s rage blinds them, and while they grow confident about their position in society, some of them grow overconfident and assume that they are better than men. Although i do not support the concept of superiority, i guess if we adopt this school of thought, it wouldn’t seem untrue if we said that an individual’s ‘superiority’ is based on how he treats his neighbour.

In a world where communication is easy, where liberty of expression is highly encouraged, we should all stick together and be united. Not as men and women. But as human beings. No one is better than the other. Neither men over women nor women over men.

Let’s focus on more pressing matters shall we? Like child exploitation or animal torture. Our actions should be driven by our humanity. Not by our sexual identity.

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Humans’ need for love.

Humans’ need for love.

As a little girl I dreamed of true love, that a fairy-tale like prince charming would pick me up in his arms and declare me his love forever. As I grew up this idea developed in a need, that later on I realized, rooted from an ever growing insecurity. Then, I reached a stage where I stopped believing in love altogether, actually considering engaging in casual relationships where feelings were not necessary. But it’s not me. And I know most people are the same. I mean, since they seem to not find ‘The One’, they end up losing hope, and thus settle for less, the comfortable, the stable. But it’s not how we should do it. I agree that sometimes love, true love, may seem overrated but when you get a hold of it, when you feel it and are able to live it to the depths of your soul, you feel complete, like the fusion of someone else’s soul with yours. Nowadays we have been conditioned into fitting society’s demands and rules. But at what price? At some point in my life I thought, why do people insist on finding someone else? can’t they be satisfied with who they are? There is art, knowledge, wealth, fun, nature, and life. All of it should be largely enough to fill someone’s life. But then I realized that all of these mean nothing, if you do not have someone to share it with.

11:23 pm letter

Could this be another change – The Samples

Dear friend,

I have seen things in my life. Elders being picked on by youngsters, priests helping a homeless man having a seizure, girls kissing, a crying teacher, a wounded dog, a child in the dirty water of the underground canal, smiling babies, a proud father, a crying mother, pink nipples, running hawkers, dried leaves flying, dead trees moving, a black dog with its newborn puppies, a red-eyed rabbit, a green-loving tortoise, a mother insulted by her daughter, half-tanned boobs of a stranger,  a tourist removing her panties in the sea, and the light coming through leaves as the sun rose. I just don’t think that I know life yet. Maybe a small part of it. A beautiful part of it. However, death seems to be a calm alternative as well. When I see the horror that human beings are capable of doing I wonder, maybe we are better off all dead. Such atrocities should not be allowed. We all have some kind of horrifying story in our life. To what degree I don’t know. My life has been pretty idle, pretty normal. I guess that explains my inability to see atrocities as a mere part of life. I wonder, are atrocities considered atrocities because society decided so? If there were no society, no rules, no norms, no values, and there were just, us. These ‘atrocities’ would still be there, except, they would only be seen as occurrences, made possible by our own very existence. So, maybe death is the solution. Death is calm, soundless. It is inevitable, and probably better for everyone.

On the other hand, there is life. Life is the wind blowing straight to your face, it is you closing your eyes as you spread your arms wide open, feeling the light on your shoulders. Life is freedom. I guess our choices define who we are. You know, choosing is way harder than just, Being. Being is like going with the flow, careless about the outcome, just enjoying whatever comes our way. Whereas choosing, choosing is choosing where to pinpoint our stream, where we want to go, and who we want to be. It is much more difficult to put ourselves out there than waiting for others to do that in our place. But when you’re a 18 year old ‘adult’ like me, you wished you could return to the time when forgetting things was the worst that could happen to you, and not the best.

I really don’t know what’s got into me, always writing letters. I guess they’re my alternative to speaking alone. At least my mother won’t listen behind the door or my sister surprising me by my window. Writing letters is much less embarrassing. You could at least pretend you’re writing an essay or something. I wonder why I’m so open. I never really was. I always kept a facade, thinking I knew what I was doing, thinking people liked it. They hated it. They still do. And I don’t really give a damn about it. Negative people belong to the thrash. I’m no better, I know, you know that. But I guess having a dark side doesn’t prevent us from seeing the darkness in others right? We see it in others, because we can recognize it. The only difference is whether you know how to pull yourself out of it or not.

The only way to go in life is forward. Thinking about the past is pointless. Memories have an effect on you when they’re worth remembering. The worst thing for someone is using his present to think about the past. It’s like rewinding the first half of a movie over and over again in your head while the second half is playing just in front of your eyes and you’re too busy remembering to notice anything. It’s hard though, not thinking about the past. It always manages to grab you and shove down your throat memories you don’t want to remember.

But everything happens for a reason. I’ve always fiercely believed in this. Anything and anyone, all heartbreaks and refusals and pain, everything has a purpose.  It may have multiple purposes as well, you just need to be open minded enough to let it in. Sad are the people who think that their life brings them nowhere. It is even worse for those who do not notice the little things and focus on the big picture. They are bound to live in a spiraling life of undeserved misery. I blame it on the materialistic nature of modern-day society. They always seem to squeeze their lemon-prejudiced acid on us, the salad before the meat. Social networking has made it even more sour, cultivating fallacy, pushing back the bounds of human decency, encouraging the outrageous hypocrisy of human identity. Duck faces have replaced values and The Biebs has replaced The rolling stones. May God forgive us.

Anyway, it is late, I may come back later.

Good night.

Ana.

The Know-It-All

My past experiences with primary and high school were not great.

You often encounter empty-headed people judging you without having an ounce of knowledge of where you come from. Sadly, this very predicament is a global phenomena. In all societies, all cultures and all spheres of human stupidity, labeling is a must if you are to be considered a fully socialized human  in a judgement-driven goal to categorize and dominate the weak. Pretty damn stupid if you ask.

The know-it-all is found everywhere. At work, at home, in the media and mostly at school. Young people love to elect the know-it-all in a collective unconscious (and in the mean circles, consciously) agreement.

The Know-it-all is often seen as annoying, attention-seeking, arrogant, ignorant, immature, naive, different, unfriendly, too friendly, desperate, irritating, stupid, show-off, awkward, mean, close-minded, distant, virginal, unattractive, asexual, uncool, retard, slow, fast and this can go on and on.

People love to feel they are above others, especially above the know-it-all. And when they are in groups, it is even more fun. [Cue the sarcasm] The know-it-all has to master the skill of ignoring the whole class rolling their eyes every time The know-it-all dares to ask a question. Of course, asking a question when you have a doubt is completely unacceptable. Oh, and there is, of course, a limit of questions you have the right to ask. Indeed, the moment you cross that limit, you are immediately considered as an attention-seeker. No, people won’t assume that you’re someone who wants to understand the fullest. No, they will, instead, appreciate and take note of the answer to the annoying question because they were too scared to ask the question themselves. Most people do not realize that The Know-it-all doesn’t give a flying fuck of their fucking opinion. That’s why The Know-it-all asks so many questions. Partly to annoy the rolling eyes, and throw rolling stones to their rolling asses when they rolling in the deep corners of  failure at their exams.

I’ve heard my fair share of snorts and snickering and gossiping about how annoying I am. People do not care about how The Know-it-all feels. They only like to react exaggeratedly to the mere answering of The know-it-all by sniggering or just scoffing. They won’t even try to understand The Know-it-all, it is so much easier to see The Know-it-all as someone to be called stupid . They won’t think that the Know-it-all has to live up to expectations at home, because her parents count on her. They won’t think a second that The Know-it-all has to face judgmental rolling eyes whenever she tries to understand better a concept she doesn’t know. Even the stupidest question is important to her. School is made to understand. The Know-it-all doesn’t want to be engrossed in that counter-culture that cultivates the notion that being rebellious and lazy and inattentive in class is “cool”. Because being rebellious, lazy and inattentive isn’t going to bring anyone anywhere. I respect all Know-it-alls in that world, because they have been strong enough to stand up against all the lazy-tards trying to lure them into an easy life.

I went from being the underestimated person to the annoying one. And if I had the chance to do it all over again, I definitely would. I changed myself because I was tired of being the loser. I changed myself for me. And if The know-it-all changed herself for those she loves, or those she hates, nothing good would come out of it. Because in the end, she’ll never be who she is. A smart person. The irony in being a know-it-all is that you never get called smart. You want to show that you are clever, but jealousy comes in the way of people or their need to crush someone and use their weakness to feel superior comes in and destroys all hope for the Know-it-all to have genuine friends.

In the mind of a know-it-all, being knowledgeable is good. But knowing the right thing is more important. The only way to do so, is by asking questions and answering them to check whether you understand. As simple as that. The know-it-all won’t give up hours of hard-work to remain silent just because others didn’t bother opening their copybooks. The know-it-all won’t be loyal to people who will never be loyal in return. It’s pathetic the way people think nowadays. This world has got a mindset that respects laziness and irresponsibility instead of morality. It has mixed up genuine friendship with friendship with benefits. It is unfair to those who work hard to have to face the bullying of every day life just because they work hard. People, seeing others being hard workers, would rather bring them down instead of trying to work hard too. And that is the sad truth people. That is the sad truth.

The Know-It-all.

Losing our touch

“It seems strange
How we used to wait for letters to arrive.
But what’s stranger still
Is how something so small can keep you alive.” ~ Arcade Fire

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When I was nine years old, I was a very curious child. I enjoyed exploring unexplored places in my house. One of these places were my parent’s room. There were these large dusty drawers that nobody opened, because they were large and dusty. I saw them as a challenge. Deep inside I felt I was going to discover some old artifacts dating back to the years of my grandparents, making me even more determined to find something. I had developed a strong passion for ancient things by then because ancient things have stories. And stories have value.

That was when I found the letters.

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In the far back of the drawer, there was a stack of letters tied carefully together . They had that old smell that I love. I remember I observed it like some weird but fascinating object that was going to reveal some hidden secret, some hidden story that was going to complete the puzzle of my family history. When I opened them, I saw that they were love letters. Love letters of my parents. I smiled but immediately felt that I was intruding the lives of two complete strangers who lived in another world that I will never get to know. A world that I never got to be a part of. The letters were written in a formal french. They had an elegant and cursive handwriting, clearly written with care and patience. It got me thinking. These love letters made thoughts nearly tangible. Through your written words, you show who you are. You make mistakes, some scratches, some hesitation in putting a coma or not. A letter isn’t just paper and pen. There is that personal feeling, that personal touch that comes with it. That is what I saw through my parents’ love letters. And it made it even more beautiful, because these letters are tangible proof that a love like my parents’ existed. I got to know, through the way they interacted, who they were before I was born. I was feeling the same sense of warmth I felt when my father reminisced his ‘courting’ days with my mother: the weird food they ate on their first date and how my grandfather always waited with an eye on the family clock when my mother had to return home after a day with my father. Emails cannot do that. Just like reading a book and an e-book is completely different. But letters, letters are much more special. Sadly, the new generation will never get to really know what it is to wait weeks for a letter from our dear ones. Most people of my age would say they never got a handwritten letter, but I’m glad to say that I did, once.

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When I was first exposed to the world wide web, I discovered a website called Students-of-the-world, which connected young people from all around the world. Each and every one of us signed up with the aim of finding a genuine friend. I put up my home address into the ‘snail mail’ list without knowing what ‘snail mail’ meant. Six years later, when I forgot all about that website, and was completely engrossed into the much more efficient Facebook, I received a letter from an 8 year old Canadian girl asking me to be her friend. I saw the doodles, the margins, the cute handwriting that made me realize that thousands of kilometers from where I was, a little girl sat down and wrote this letter to me. She took a moment to think about me, a complete stranger. Needless to say, the Disney stickers were the ones that stole my heart.

I was feeling something that no conversations on Facebook could ever replace. It was not about efficiency this time, it was about finding a friend. A true friend. A friend somewhere in the world who is genuinely interested in what you feel, in what you are going through and who is willing to help however he/she can. I am glad I got that letter. It could have gone to anyone who could care less. But it came to my letter box, and I think it happened for a reason. It reestablished my faith in humankind as I started to believe in the genuineness of people. A Facebook/Skype conversation could never achieve that feat.

Unfortunately, I never got the occasion to reply to the little girl. I felt really bad for some time but then I realized that she probably sent multiple letters to other people since the good thing about the website is that we never run out of people to send letters to.

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I want people to realize that we need to maintain that art in a world that is becoming paperless. We focus too much on efficiency at the expense of individuality. Things have become easy, but at what price? Letter-writing is an art that has allowed people in despair to clutch letters to their chest whenever they felt lonely. A man who is ready to take his life uses Facebook as a way to say goodbye to friends and family and that night he ends up sleeping with a stack of letters tucked beneath his pillow, scripted by people who were there for him when.

The mere fact that somebody would even just sit down  and pull out a piece of paper and think about someone the whole way through, with an intention that is so much harder to unearth when the browsers are up and the Iphone is pinning and we’ve got six conversations rolling in at once, that is an art form that does not fall down to a life that gets faster no matter how many social networks we might join. We still clutch closely those letters to our chest, to the words that speak louder than loud, when we turn pages into pallets to say the things that we have needed to say, the words that we have needed to write to sisters and brothers and even to strangers for far too long.

M.C.A.L

Being Straight about Gays.


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Congratulations to the gay community of California! It now becomes the 13th state, and the largest, to allow same-sex marriage 🙂

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Still, some *cough* assh_les *cough* are voicing out their frustration. I’m all for giving your opinion, as long as you do not harm anyone.

Here’s one:

“This outrage tops off a chronic pattern of lawlessness, throughout this case, by judges and politicians hell-bent on thwarting the vote of the people to redefine marriage by any means, even outright corruption,” said Andy Pugno, general counsel for the ProtectMarriage.com Coalition.

But he did not, however, actively threaten to fight on.

“It remains to be seen whether the fight can go on, but either way, it’s a disgraceful day for California,” he said.

[Source]

But well, criticisms will never end. If we spent all of our time listening to them, we wouldn’t have time to rejoice 😉

Nevertheless, I think that people nowadays, even if they are more ‘open minded’ they still have a sort of misconception about Homosexuality.

According to Wikipedia, Homosexuality is “romantic attraction, sexual attraction or sexual behavior between members of the same sex or gender.”

In the Bible, homosexuality is “an abomination”, “a detestable act” and those who are ‘guilty’ of it “shall surely be put to death.”

Let us take a moment to think about the absurdity of this definition

Done?

Okay, so let’s start.

Homosexuality is the concern of no one else but those who actually are together. One’s sexual orientation is private. Just like the porn you hide under your bed, or in your internet history. Banning it is taking away people’s choice to be with the person they love. We should be free of choosing whoever we want to be with and to have a family with. It is revolting when we think about it. I mean, two people who love each other should not have to justify why they want to be together, why they are who they are. Adolescents feel that need constantly, and it is annoying enough.

If close-minded people encourage people of the same ethnicity, religion, class and colour to marry why should they be against those with the same sexual identity? I know, the answer is ‘obvious’, ‘it is not natural, it goes against all the norms and values set by society’. However, love should not be a legal concern whenever religion, ethnicity, sex or class is concerned. You can’t choose who you love. And others should not choose it for us either. It just…happens. And making them feel like it is wrong? Bullsh_t. You just cannot accept change. Change is good when countless of children are being neglected or abandoned by straight, poor, underage or irresponsible parents and want to be adopted. Change is good when the rates of divorce have had a 41.3% increase over the years because of unhappiness in marriages. Change is good when gay people have had enough of constant persecution from homophobes but still fight for their rights every freaking year. Change is good when Gay, lesbian and bisexual teens are five times more likely to commit suicide than their heterosexual counterparts.

The Stonewall 2012 Survey discovered that 3% of gay men and 5% of bisexual men had attempted to take their own life, compared to only 0.4% of men in general. In the 16- to 24-year-old age group, 6% of gay and bisexual men had attempted to take their own life compared to less than 1% of men in general. In May 2013, the death of Mark Fear highlighted the need for further research into suicide among later age groups in the gay community. It is already well documented that the suicide rate for men generally increases with age.

This is why it is essential to stop this injustice.

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Years ago, racism was accepted by the majority because they didn’t know. They didn’t know that black people are no less intelligent that white ones. They didn’t know that love between a black and a white person is perfectly normal. They were ignorant; just like they are now. They thought black people weren’t normal human beings just as now when they think of homosexuals. Women’s rights are the same. They just wanted to fight for their rights and they made a change.

In fact, they are stronger since they know what persecution tastes like. Let us fight for it to stop.

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Side note: Homosexuality is not a new phenomena, it has been going on for as long as humanity existed. Shakespeare had love affairs with men. Even better, Oscar Wilde was a homosexual. He is one of the most popular examples of persecuted homosexuals of the Victorian Era.

[Link]

Homosexuality isn’t just about sex between two people. It is about love. Religions preach love too, but they are ironically the fiercest opponents of homosexuality. 84% of people who attend church regularly and 81% of self-identified Evangelicals support the Proposition 8 (the law against same-sex marriage)

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Religions are against it because they know that if people support it, they won’t have any control on them. Actually, how can be base ourselves on the Bible when it has been modified several times? We can’t. One mistranslated word can lead to a completely different meaning.  And sadly, homophobes relish using it as a means to fight off those who do not want to Conform to the ‘rules’ that only serve the Elite.

Unfortunately in Mauritius, homosexuality isn’t really accepted. This is because here, the population is made mostly of people of asian origin: Indians and Chinese. Then you’ve got the Africans and the Europeans.  Asian tradition focuses on marriage between a man and a woman. Religion and traditional culture dominate our way of life [although it is changing with the new generations]. However, young people are still very close to their family and they feel the pressure of having to fulfill their expectations. Being gay is only going to bring shame upon their family name. There was this case in 2006 I think, where a girl was imprisoned in her own house by her parents because she wanted to be with another girl. Everyone in the family participated in tying her up on a chair and spend days brainwashing her into becoming heterosexual again. This is how it was. Institutionalized and internalized homophobia is a horrible phenomena.

Now there are organizations such as the ‘Collectif Arc-en-ciel’ group which fights for LGBT rights and organizes Gay Pride parades every year. Sadly, I do not see any chances for the Mauritian government to legalize same-sex marriage in the future 5-10 years.

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The persecution has to end.

What can we do?

We must fight this epidemic through reaching out, understanding, empathizing and supporting people. We must do more to retain interest; instead of people coming and joining in once or twice then disconnecting, we must help them to integrate and take part, becoming long term members of and contributors to our community and organizations. We may need to follow up non-attendance. Where people are striving to reach their goals we must take an interest, mentor and encourage. We have already lost too many gay and lesbian people to suicide and we must resolve to do more to fight this scourge.

[Source]

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Let me be straight about gays, they just happen to be different. If you do not agree, don’t get all hysterical about it. Come, let’s take a cup of tea while discussing the reasons why you’re wrong 🙂

Here’s a song that may change your mind:

Same Love – Macklemore

Peace out.

M.C.A.L

We are the change

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Never bend your head. Always hold it high. Look the world right in the eye. – Helen Keller

From the first days of our socialization into this wide, wide world, we have been taught things that were supposed to make us grow up into better individuals. We were introduced to the notion of politeness and were sanctioned if we were rude. Respect and integrity were displayed everywhere, in movies and newspapers, as virtues that anyone should have if we wanted to be honest and responsible citizens of this ‘perfect’ world. We were shaped to fit. And those who didn’t went straight to the societal trash.

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But, as a child, I did not understand any of that, because I was still learning the notion of right and wrong. However, some less glorious qualities still  confused me. I did not understand the word ‘jealousy’. I did not know that I had to be jealous if my sister got a bigger Christmas gift than me. It wasn’t until my mother told me to stop being jealous that I actually felt jealousy. It was then that I began being jealous of the new clothes of the little girls I saw on the street, of the amount of toys my cousins always played with when we went to visit them. It is when we are exposed to an emotion that we begin to feel its impact on our being. The challenge is to tame it; as emotions can be dangerous when we forget to control them.

Nevertheless, I understood principles. I grew up believing that honesty was the best policy and that being fair brought you further than those who weren’t. I enjoyed the idea that the world was just, and doing your best was what was asked to be successful. How wrong I was.

In a society like Mauritius, where the Elite reigns over the common people, meritocracy is a fairy tale. No matter how hard you work, you will probably never reach the professional position of the one in control, but only of the one being controlled. The glass ceiling does not exist for those with power, money or reliable social relations. Sadly, it only does for those who have none of these three.

How do you expect the future generation of young adults to believe in hard work and meritocracy if both factors are ignored when a competing candidate *knows* the CEO? Favouritism is a common factor in Mauritius and it is starting to annoy the hell out of me. I want to work hard and earn what I deserve. But society is forcing me to cheat if I want to be successful. Forcing is a strong word. But it is what I feel. It isn’t fair for someone who has grown up believing in fairness to be told to accept favouritism as a means to an end. It isn’t right. The Elite taught us that. But then the old generation tells us to take ‘shortcuts’ if we want to get what we want?  Do you realize how messed up this is? Trampling on common principles to bypass the one who worked hard his whole life to get what he deserves isn’t right. Using connections for a promotion isn’t right. Using family ties for a job acceptance isn’t right. The Elite teaches humility to shut the common people up. They use religion to calm down riots and make the common people go back to work so that they can make more profits on the People’s scarred, bent and rough back.  The Elite cannot understand what the People feel. They do not care. Yet, they claim they do.

The only way to end all of this is through exposure. Exposing all transactions and documents explaining why things were done a certain way would clear out all blurry situations. Then, people will stop asking questions, and others will stop hiding answers. The Elite will be Forced to accept Meritocracy as a way of living. Then the new generation will feel like what they do is going to bring real results, not the made up ones used to slow down stubborn hard workers. They will feel that it will be worth it.

I’m not saying that our world is perfect, or will ever be, for that matter. But stop trying to fight for equality because it may never happen is like stopping the fight to eradicate poverty because it may always exist. We must never give up; it is our role to make a change. We are the change.

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M.C.A.L